Poetry

The universe, in response to my unrelenting quest

The universe, in response to my unrelenting quest, revealed its true nature to me. Only that I cannot convey its perfection by any means, as it exists beyond the limitations of language, or any other form of expression. And it is this very impossibility that lies at the heart of every photograph and every piece of writing I have created since this unveiling. The chance to express even a momentary glimpse of that eternal, perfect realm is enough to fuel my soul through this life and into whatever may arise after.

Bathed in the blue cloak of morning

Bathed in the blue cloak of morning,
The winged creature orchestra
Sings a masterpiece for no one.
Wise giants whisper in unison
While the window units whir on.
Human silence, the perfect tune.
And wind, that river of reminders:
Let your thoughts drift to the ether,
Pass through the pink scarred sky,
For transcendence through healing
Is the way to lasting light.

The Rain Rumbles

The rain rumbles
Settling in my skin
All I want to do is
Feel warmth again
To be free and alive
Far from hate and strife
Let me dance in love
Flow through the wind
Please oh god let me live again

I Sit Quietly In The Chair

I sit quietly in the chair
While my nail technician
Paints this beautifully soft,
Pastel purple color on my
Nails, and I can’t help but
Think: I love these bright,
Simple-minded colors, because
They contrast the complexity
Of soul entangled beneath
This flesh of mine.

 

Absence / Presence

I was once engulfed in the depths of absence. The piercing light returned my soul to presence. Yet every so often I catch a glimpse of the underground. The shadows remain to give form to the otherwise obscure nature of eternity. One cannot be known without the contrast of the other.

Think Less, Feel More

The more time that passes from my studies at grad school, the more I am drawn to the simple. Not the theoretically complex simple, not the complex masking itself in veiled simplicity, just, simple. It was necessary to learn theory and history, to be so inside the ‘mind’ of it all, but I have become increasingly disinterested in making art that ‘challenges’ the medium or even makes the viewer think in any way. There are enough things in this world that make us think and keep us locked inside our well-furnished minds - what I find is an increasingly dwindling space of experiences that makes us FEEL. I hope for my photographs to make you feel something, maybe peace, something unexpected, maybe it enlivens a long forgotten cob-webbed memory, maybe something similar to what it conjures within myself, maybe nothing at all, maybe the sharp pain of apathy.

Anything to help you feel the fullness of what it means to be you, alive and breathing through those lungs - with your own thoughts and memories and ways of looking at the world; With your own unseen universe that I can only imagine how cavernous and wonderful it is. As Robert Frank so succinctly put, “when people look at my photographs, I want them to feel the way they do when they want to read a line of a poem twice.”

I am in the process of re-learning how to think less, and feel more.

 

Someone In My Dream Asked Me What Your Name Was, 2023, from the ongoing series Traces of Silence

 

To Awake On a Crisp Morning (Poem)

Dreams,

Dreams,

Jelly beans.

I toss and turn

Like a laundry machine.

I dance in the night

Unafraid of the curse.

I smile in the sun

Knowing I’m my cure.

Love is here in my very bones

Wrapping me in blankets

Like an oversized coat.

The plane floats away

As the leaves turn green.

The train passes by,

Oh what a strange dream.

Poem Drafts

I feel held together by threadbare shoe strings

And worn out elastic 

But he said I spin the finest of silks

_

I reside beneath the guise of personality 

A busy mind makes a foggy mirror

Spirit is synonymous with light

You are spirit disguised as human

06/25/96-03/23/23

My brother
Michael is dead.
I danced around him
In a blue tutu as children.
I snuck him sweet chocolate
And we rode the rocking horse.
Our parents took us to the zoo,
He was always smiling, my silly,
Sarcastic, sensitive little brother.
He could not speak but he spoke
My name when we were children.
He taught me the wordless gift of
intuition and what the spirit world was like.
We would watch his eyes and know that he
Was dancing with the angels in divine light.

Oh Brother, I Love You So

Oh brother, I love you so

We shared more than blood,

We shared a light-filled soul.

An ineffable bond I could not know,

Not truly until you went back home.

But now that you’re there, 

I sense your presence everywhere.

I feel the thread between your soul and mine,

One day we will dance together in the great divine.

Blue swirls drown my soul

Blue swirls drown my soul

As we sit and wait for the unknown toll.

I anguish in a green taxi waiting in traffic -

I see the beauty in her mismatched outfit.

The pain of your death is searing

And yet somehow it helps me see more clearly.

All that is real, true and worth the most

Is that which no man or mind can compose.

We have to be our own sunshine

“How Infectious!”

Infection!

Get the jab or die!

FEAR! DIVISION! ANGER! 

(The changing faces of suffering)

What has happened to this world?

He was only talking about

The infectious affect

Of her radiant smile.

She told him, 

“With a world as dark as ours,

We have to be our own sunshine.”